Peace and Serenity

It amazes me every single time how much the Bush Block reconnects and recharges me. Sitting under the bush fig tree listening to the sound track that is the Australian summer. The call of the birds and the constant whirl of insects. Some sounds I know while others are a curiosity to my ears.

Every time I arrive, I ask myself “why don’t I come up more often?” Often I just can’t make it to the Bush Block due to running a household and working ridiculous hours (of which I need to cut back on!). It’s that old push pull of, if I go to the bush block then no housework gets done and I’ll have to find time midweek to do all the laundry.

Over the last few months I have decided that I will say yes more often to spending quality time out here but, frankly I need some better systems in place. This is so I don’t feel stressed when we come back from the weekend and nothing is organised and ready to go to commence the new week. I guess I’m lucky and grateful that this is even a complaint in my life.

But for now I am absorbed in the sights, sounds and smells that the Bush Block has for me. There is a gentle, cool breeze kissing my face and my youngest born is having an open conversation. The cicadas are a symphony of sound and brings pleasure to my senses. When I look up the old bush gif tree is ripe with fruit. Providing for all the animals.

Australian bush figs

At this moment there is no better place to be. Then as if by magic cattle start to arrive over the hill. This moment of pleasure will now be replaced with my family working cattle. Another pleasure in our lives. Family team work and caring for livestock. I feel such gratitude for all that we have.

The creek that runs through the middle of our Bush Block.

Learner Sewer

For as long as I remember I’ve always wanted to sew. My mother and great-aunt were both sewers and at various times would give me little lessons. However, I was impatient and just wanted to “sew stuff”!

Years went by and I decided I was happy enough to just buy clothes or have my mum mend anything. I struggled to sew buttons on (probably more to do with laziness then ability) or re-hem items. If I could staple hems up I did. And yes I do mean stables out of stabler, but one does need a solid stabler not the cheap little ones. Just a little advice for those other non sewers like I was.

Once Hubby become ill in 2020 with the pandemic hitting, I was on leave. I soon discovered that I don’t do bored. Enter stage left, a new skill learning and a beautiful friend who gifted me her step mother in laws old fabric stash. A stash worth in the thousands, fills two massive suitcases and she was just going to throw away. I was also lucky to stumble across a fantastic Aussie YouTube channel who teaches the skills of sewing. I was on my way!

I consumed all that I could from that channel. If you are interested check out her channel Evelyn Wood. I even joined her sewing school (Vintage Sewing School is what it’s called, just giggle and join you won’t regret it). Next minute, I’ve started to plan and prep for my first ever proper skirt from an old 1980’s pattern. It didn’t even have my size but I figured out how to trace the pattern and at the same time make it bigger to fit my measurements. I even made a toile to learn and practice more. I was taking notes and being slow and methodical with my processes.

The skirt pattern.
Re-reading my instructions cause frankly some of the diagrams and words did not make sense to me.

There were times when I still had no idea what I was doing but just trusted the process. When I did the waistband I did not understand what the pattern was telling me. I followed the instructions and asked for helped on the sewing school platform then just trusted the process. I went with it and then it was like magic. The waistband came out just like the diagram and the lightbulb finally turned on.

Trusted the process and it turned out. Woot woot!

I was on a roll. I even learnt how to put a zipper in. To say I was impressed with myself is and was an understatement. I have now completed two skirts from this pattern. The second skirt I was even able to add pockets. Are they perfect. No! But are they wearable and no-one knows I made them, yes. Unless I tell them I’ve made it, which I do cause hey, why not. We should all be proud of ourselves when we learn new skills and achieve “things” we didn’t think we were capable of.

So know it’s your turn. What is a skill that you’ve always wanted to try your hand at but haven’t. Go on a challenge yourselves. As Nike states “Just do it!”

Why do I run?

I’ve slowly come to accept that I am a runner. A label I never thought would apply to me. It certainly wasn’t an activity or sport I willing did as a child. Besides my younger brother was the “talented” track and field person in the family.

However one day Hubby Dearest came home with a bonafide work dog linage kelpie pup. As that pup grew it needed more and more activity. Our backyard wasn’t fenced so that growing pup needed to be exercised.

Let’s just say after a physical day Hubby Dear wasn’t taking the dog for kilometres on end walkies.

Biddy became my run buddy. Together we learnt how to run. For her it was all about running on a leash and sitting whenever we had to cross roads and to not run up to people. She’s a big kelpie and all red so for some it freaked them out when she ran full tilt up to them for pats.

For me it was a journey of realising I can run. I can run long distances. I can run distances and get better times each time.

I now run twice a week with a friend where we solve the problems of the world. I run for my mental health and my physical health. Especially my physical as I become an adult with asthma (something I never realised one could develop in adulthood!)

Unfortunately Biddy is no longer my running buddy. Her hips are going and she is completely deaf. I will run with the rest of our Kelpie pack but I look like a mad woman with 5 kelpies all over the place. Lucky we live out of town so my biggest issue is making sure they don’t chase the hares or the cows in the paddocks.

However, my why I run has never really changed. Evolved over the years, yes, but the reasons are the same. I am a runner and that has been a powerful realisation for me.

Comrades or Work Wives….

I know I have spoken in previous blogs about my job. For anyone new, I’m a teacher. I’ve taught instrumental music to classroom music, primary school and for the last 10 plus yearS high school.

I can not say this loudly enough, my best teaching experiences have come when I’ve had the best people to work with. And yes, some times those people have become my work wives/husbands. These were people who I was able to have those big belly laughs with, who supported and participated in all my crazy ideas and who ultimately pushed me to be better than I am. Plus underneath all that have my very best interests at heart (like a wife/husband does).

This year I have found myself with so much incredible support. I have a teaching partner who is amazing. I can honestly say I’ve never had some one who is so in synch with me and pushes me to do better, yet also celebrates our wins for our students.

I even have bosses who push me in a positive way and trust in my work. Most importantly, I have a colleague who is a dear friend. Who is so part of my families ‘village’, is also helping to raise my boys. All these amazing people that I currently have in my work life, help my work life be such a rich and enjoyable tapestry. Can I also say, my work relations makes coming home easier for my actual husband who doesn’t have to listen to all the boring details of my job.

These people haven’t been my first patchwork quilt of comrades and hopefully they won’t be my last. However, I thank them for ‘keeping me sane’. Work relationships and friendships you have at work, always help your job run that little smoother. I know for me those friendships and relationships have made a tough job that little bit easier and certainly helps teaching students a job worthwhile.

The little notes given to one another, coffee made with love (that’s the chocolate on top) by each other and flowers grown by colleagues and given as gifts.

Family Dinners

So, question…..who actually enjoys preparing and cooking family dinners? I know there are a wide variety of opinions on this particular meal of the day. One only needs to look on Facebook for large swaths of people who have created groups just to this one meal. Everything from fussy eaters to budget dinners to help, I haven’t gone grocery shopping what could I make with this bunch of random ingredients.

Personally for me, I don’t mind it. I’m happy to whip something up, and by whip up, I do mean sometimes I’m that person asking myself “now what could I do with 2 minute noodles to make it less like a uni dinner and more a family meal…..hmmmmmm…….”.

What I prefer for family dinners is that I’m prepared. I do best when I have some idea about what we will eat for a full week. I hate having done a full day at work and then, when I arrive home at 6pm go, “what will I cook now?” That is the pits! However, in the past 12 months or so I have made sure my boys can now cook at least one family meal to perfection (and no, I’m not being biased, their dinners are amazing and they invite the extended family and friends out without me knowing about it!). I guess I made sure they have a signature dish. Part of my contribution to society when my boys leave our nest.

I guess I’m one of the lucky few that enjoys cooking. Happy to cook dinners and breakfast and even lunch, just don’t ask me to do packed school lunches. They are the bane of my existence. I hate packing school lunches! I’m thinking that might be for another post.

My favourite for family dinners is when I have freezer cooked. It’s way better food frozen and ready to go, not like some of that interesting frozen food from the frozen food aisle. Nasty looking and tasting some of those meals! What I like the most about family dinners is when we sit down together as a family.

I guess that’s my why. Husband Dear and I have always, even before our children, sat for a family meal. Its the time when everyone is able to talk and decompress and express themselves and how their day went. So if it’s a fancy roast dinner to a fancy 2 minute noodles it’s not about the cooking but about the “breaking bread” together. That’s my why, so what’s your why?

Biddy

I remember when Husband Dear first bought home this tiny red fluff ball of a kelpie puppy. She was about 6 weeks old, maybe 7, and was a gift to our oldest boy as a 2nd birthday present. Yes, we were that family that gifted our son his first ever dog.

Now the puppy was part of a plan. I was about 2 months away from giving birth to our 2nd child. We thought a puppy would be a great way for him to learn how to treat a living ‘thing’ gently. It was the best thing we could have done. He loved her so well and gently.

Of course, he wasn’t really ever left alone with her either. She was our first family pet. Even for my Husband, who had always had working dogs, he had never really had one as pet. This dog become my running buddy. It was she, that made me ‘learn’ and become interested as a runner. Remember, she was a kelpie and had come from working stock. We had no fence and she need exercise! Lets just say I become pretty good at running as I took her morning and night.

She become bomb proof with 2 little boys always around. She was kind and gentle and just wanted someone to pat her. Her tactic was to sit next to you and place her head on your thigh. Perfect height that you automatically started to pat her. She also never came inside unless you invited her. My mother was the one that taught her to play ball. To the point that she was always focused on a ball. It has now left her with worn teeth from always playing ball and chewing on said ball as she bought it back to you.

Her antics continued even when we moved to our new place on the river. She finally had cows to bark at. Her contribution, with the rest of our working dogs is to be the rah rah, cheer squad to keep them excited and working hard. Even now, with dodgy hips she will still rah rah if she gets the chance around our little block. She refuses to come with us to the big block (bad memories of getting left behind unfortunately) these days.

That was 13 years ago now. About 3 months ago she stopped being my running partner. I still feel a little sad about no longer having her while I run. Her hips were too sore for me to pick her up into the car for my 5:30am runs with my buddy. She hasn’t been able to jump into a car for the last year or so.

Even now she will still just want to be with you and still place her head on your thigh to automatically pat her. Her hearing is gone and her hips are going the same way, but she is still our Biddy. Our first family pet dog.

Rites of Passage

The other week a friend asked if I could take photos of her children at their senior formal (for other parts of the world this is known as prom).Lets just say I was nervous. Actually lets be real, I was petrified! These were photos to mark a tremendous point in time for the family, a rite of passage marked as a celebration for ending high school.

Well I managed to do it without stuffing up, but the whole event got me thinking. What are this generations Rite’s of Passages? Not only what are their rites of passage, but are those rites of passage any different for each generation?

Does each generation just tweak the previous generations ideals to modernize or to put their own mark on it? If nothing else, taking photos of my friends children at their senior formal, had me think fondly of my formal. The excitement in the lead up and the next chapter of my life.

It also made me reflect on what rites of passage my own children will have. For one thing a senior formal means completing high school. Something at least one of my children will struggle to do. Not that he will be a high school drop out, but will instead start his career path early with an apprenticeship. His rite of passage will be completion of an apprenticeship, which will probably be a bigger impact for him than a senior formal. And a rite of passage which I will be so proud of for him!

The idea of him not having a senior formal makes me sad, however this rite of passage is meant to be for him. His own path to explore and discover and for us as parents to assist and guide him through. Eventually he will have his own rites of passage that I will not be apart of but merely a spectator. However, I have started to think that some rites of passage aren’t just important for the students, but also for the parents.

Growing Up

Sunday marked the birthday of my youngest son. He turned the big 13. Two months ago our eldest son turned 15. I remember giving birth and people saying to me “cherish every moment as they grow up quick”.

At the time I was pretty blasé about that comment. Both boys were so little and time didn’t feel like it was moving fast enough. Besides I was excited at what would happen next. What would they achieve as they got older, when would they walk and talk? How were they going to develop from tiny babies to toddlers, childhood teenagers to adult?

Just chilling with some bulls. Cause that’s how my boys roll

Well, I can’t answer the question of what will happen in the future but I do have wonderful memories of them growing up so far. My boys have taught me so much, especially about boys.

My Baby Boy is caring and oh so huggable. He always has a warm smile and a twinkle in his eye. As he grows into himself I hope he never loses that. My eldest boy is also caring but not as huggable, he has a quick wit and a sense of humour. He will say the craziest things and leave you wondering if that is true or not, and generally it is.

What I do know about boys is that each boy grows up differently. Oldest Boy and Baby Boy do have some cross overs, however even those are somehow unique to them. Currently both are sleeping lots then they wake and they’ve grown some. It’s like they are babies in another trimester but it’s like a 4th or 5th mester! They go to sleep and grow another 10cm taller!

Baby Boy is a gamer which drives us nuts. Let’s just say I don’t think we’ve seen the last of the arguments regarding that hobby! Nor the steep and constant learning curve he still hasn’t learnt concerning what is ‘free’ on the internet. As a family we have had and no doubt will continue to have conversations about app purchasing!

Even with the frustrations of parenting and children learning to grow up, all I can say is they are right and have a place in the world. As soon as your children are born you love them fiercely and unconditionally. That will never stop.

Rituals

Every morning Husband Dear and I always sit and have our morning cuppa, together. Before the cuppa the dogs are let out. This happens every morning. If this routine is missed or messed around with, it gives a weird vibe to the rest of the day!

Every morning we sit and look at this view over our cuppa.

My rituals and that of my family give me great comfort each day. There is a simple joy and gratefulness that these simple daily acts bring to ones life. I even know how early or late I am based on when I pass our smiling, big waving local primary school bus driver. That lady always puts a smile on my face.

Once at school my rituals continue to ground me. Those rituals have even extended to the “wellbeing” of my colleagues as we gather around the coffee machine and chat. Chat about our day ahead, what happened yesterday and just generally catching up. It may not look like much but when it doesn’t happen it throws a lot of people out of sorts. How do I know? Because many of them tell me.

I always thought of the word ritual as a religious thing. The older I get the more I have learnt that ritual isn’t about religion. Spiritual, yes, but not necessarily religious.

As I continue to grow and learn, my rituals have become an important part of my life. I never realised how many different rituals I had or was apart of during the course of my day, unless I miss one. I have come to realise our daily rituals, no matter how simple or small they are can give our lives a purpose. Have you ever stopped and thought about why rituals are important to you and your family? Or what daily acts do you do everyday, and if they don’t happen throws you for a six?

Gratefulness

It’s been twelve months since Husband Dear became extremely ill. If that wasn’t stressful enough it all had to happen when the pandemic hit and we were in lock down. However, after twelve months I’ve continually reflected on what happened

As a family we became a stronger unit. I love that my children are capable boys. Their academics may not be top notch but I no longer worry about how that system measures them. I know they are smart and I know they can look after themselves and others. Our trial of illness and pandemic effects showed me just how capable my children are.

I discovered how deep I can go to keep on going. What I realised about myself is that giving up doesn’t seem to be in my vocabulary. It’s not that I don’t consider giving up, it’s just that it never occurs to me. I’m still deciding if that is a good thing or not.

What I am truely grateful for from the pandemic first impacting our lives, is that we became brave enough to take that final leap. The leap for Husband Dear to fully commit to farming cattle. Since the day I met him he has wanted to return to his roots of farming.

I am so thankful that I have such an amazing job. A job that at times I have desperately wanted to walk away and give up but, I keep going back to. A job that I have come to realise is my passion. I love teaching and it allows me the freedom of finance and time. Not always bucket loads of time but more time than most professions. This job allows us for Husband Dear to farm, for my boys to continue to develop their independence and gives me a deep sense of satisfaction.

There many other aspects of my life that I too am grateful for. And I guess the pandemic was very much a silver lining for us. Twelve months later and I am still discovering so much about myself and my family. For me it starts with what I am thankful for. So what are you thankful for?